I (heart) Harry Potter

Good grief, y'all.

I am joining the mass hysteria surrounding the release of book #7 and I don't care. Call me a nerd or dork or whatever but I am SO EXCITED! And if truth be told, David is too. It's really for his own safety that he read Deathly Hallows because I will explode without someone to discuss it with!

I finished book 6 earlier this week and have quite a few questions about what will come in DH. Ashley is doing a very thorough job of evaluating every question left unanswered and theory proposed so I might just rely on her to cover the bases.

I am going to Hastings this weekend to reserve my copy for pickup at 12:01 on Saturday. Yippee! Oh, and yes, I will be there at midnight to get my paws on the thing. Apparently I will be joining in the festivities of a 'really cool' party (Hastings lady's words, not mine) and I'm sure I will feel like a humongous dweeb. I wonder if there will be butterbeer?!

Blog Reunion, of sorts

I make it a habit to regularly check the blogs of friends to see what they are up to, what their kids' latest adventures are or their commentary on a variety of subjects. Every now and again I will pop over to other websites/blogs to kill some time and goof off.

One such site is Tomato Nation (http://www.tomatonation.com/). I used to read it semi frequently (thanks to Niki's link) but have since forgotten about it for, like, a year. Today, for whatever reason, I clicked on over and was reminded of why I liked it so much two years ago.

Sarah (Sars) lives in New York City and will post movie reviews, advice or just short stories. I found this entry and laughed and laughed. I actually laughed until I cried, more than once. I'm not sure if it is truly that funny or if I was just on a hormone high, but either way she's got a way with words.

Lifted from http://www.tomatonation.com/:

Buggin'

[about two weeks ago]

Eating lemon sorbet at my desk, straight from the pint with a serving spoon like the classy dame I am, I drop a nickel-sized blob of sorbet next to the keyboard. My desk is actually not a desk, it's unfinished lumber laid on top of two bookcases, so I can't really wipe up spills; I blot them and try to forget them. Usually.

[about ten days ago]

…But not always.

My fridge gets a little overeager at times and just straight-up freezes everything — better that than the alternative, I suppose, but it's a bit difficult to see the bright side when you've just sprained your wrist trying to cut an onion-sicle. After dressing a salad with some vinaigrette cubes and eating in front of the TV, I settled back at my desk with a (frozen, unbeknownst to me) can of Diet Coke, which promptly [chonk!] convexed on the bottom of the can, [spenk!] convexed on the top of the can, [fffffsssss!] announced its displeasure with this room-temp state of affairs, and then [fsshhplap!] Bellagio-fountained the left side of my desk with ice chips and denatured aspartame. Three hectares of paper towel later, I settled back at my desk again, with a glass of lime seltzer this time, because of course that was the last Diet Coke in the refrigerator. Explody little bitch.

[Sunday before last]

Out of the corner of my eye, I saw what looked like an orange cat doing the hokey-pokey. I closed my eyes for a moment, reminding myself that while I do have an orange cat, he does not dance, and perhaps I should think about getting more sleep, but when I re-opened my eyes, sure enough: you put the left paw in, you draw the left paw back, you put the left paw in, then you pat the floor nine times, you do the Hobey-pokey and you pounce on bits of lint, what is that all a-bout.

Well, he'd found a very very tiny ant, is what, and the two of them were locked in a pat-pat-pat-pat-pat/play dead/run off/pat-pat-pat-pat-pat paw de deux, which went on for another twenty minutes, at which time I couldn't take it anymore and blew the ant under the TV.

This may have been a mistake.

[six days ago]

"Oh, hello, ant."

[five days ago]

"Beat it, ant. [flick] Beat it, other ant. [flick] You too, other ant…s. [flick flick]"

[three days ago]

I got to my desk and found two ants standing on the site of the sorbet blob, shooting the shit. I mushed them both; minutes later, another ant crossed the keyboard and over my hand to get to the blob. After snacking on the blob for a few seconds, it strolled over to a former Diet Coke puddle. "I have ants," I said, to no one. "Faaaaaan-tastic. Not." The ant zipped behind a brass bookend and out of sight.

I cleared off the desk and Lysoled the hell out of it. When I could kind of breathe again, I Febrezed it for good measure. I put everything back on the desk. The next ant is apparently hoping for a career in show business, because with perfect comic timing it waited exactly three beats after I'd sat back down, then made its entrance from behind a Bill Bryson book.

An hour and a half was then wasted trying to arrange a Post-It that says "FUCK OFF, ANTS" on it next to the sorbet blob, then waiting for an ant to walk in front of it so I could take a picture.

[two days ago]

I cleared everything off the bookshelves. It was a dusty, shoulder-muscle-twanging pain in the ass, but I knew this would not end until I flushed out the queen and flattened her with a vintage dictionary, so into the breach I went with Swiffer sheets, soapy water, and the righteous rage of a woman who has excused her horrendous housekeeping failures for years on the grounds that at least she never had insects.

On the plus side, I forgot I even owned that biographical dictionary of film. On the minus side, many sneezes and no queen. It is true that I did not see any ants on the desk afterwards, but I did see one on top of a picture frame on the living room table, carrying a tiny set of surveyor's equipment and wearing a tiny tinted visor. I leaned down to the ant: "You tell Big Mama that when I find her, she's toast." The ant was like "whatever man" and then I was embarrassed because I tried to threaten an ant, and it didn't even work.

[also two days ago]

It was nighttime; I had plans later, but right then I was chilling on the couch paying bills and watching Rocky IV on Spike. The cats, typically, remained quiet and unobtrusive throughout the relatively dull "Apollo, I must warn you for the purposes of dramatic irony that this fight with Drago is a bad fucking call" lead-up. Nor did the scuffling start during the interminable James Brown performance (but how awesome is Apollo's short-sleeved sequined Star-Spangled Banner tailcoat? In fact, how awesome is Apollo Creed? Can someone please start a band and name it "Apollo Creed's Restless Ghost"? That guy is a honey-baked ham. What ever happened to Carl Weathers, anyway?). No, they waited until the climactic moment of the exhibition match when the Cold War is punching Apollo in the head, to death, to come barreling out of the bedroom all scrambly pouncy, and Hobey's tail was so fat, he looked like a beaver, but it's not like that's anything new.

The cats chasing a beetle the size of a baseball? Yeah, that's new.

I have never seen a creature like that in my life. It looked like a toy, or a beetle crafted by the effects department for a movie about…I don't even know. Baseball beetles from outer space. And where did the cats chase it? Straight at my legs. That thing was fast, too. I think. It sounded fast. The sound of its hooves on my wood floor sounded pretty fast to me.

So, it ran under the couch. Terrific. I assume it's still under there, snacking on a mastodon leg or whatever it is prehistoric carnivorous beetles who owe me fuckin' rent do in their spare time. I promptly packed up my bindle and went over to Skyrockets's house, and the cats followed me to the door all "you're going to leave us alone with that thing?" and I was like, "Nice knowing you, bye," and ran away.

The SIZE of a BASE! BALLLLLLL! Gee-ROSS!

I will not sit here and tell you I don't eat on the couch, drop crumbs on the floor between the table and the couch, and leave the crumbs there for a couple of days until I get motivated to sweep. I will not sit here and tell you that I pull all those board games and books and photo albums and dead labor leaders out from under the couch every time I mop the living room, either, because I don't, because it's a pain in the ass. And I will not sit here and tell you that I'm going to start now, because the Beetletron 3000 is under there, and if I scare him out, he's going to Drago me.

But I have to. Otherwise the next chapter in the saga is going to involve coming home from work and finding rats trying on my shoes.

Why now?

OMG! Did you laugh as hard as me?! Maybe it's funny to me because we are currently fighting an ant war at our house. Sorry bastards. No beetles, however, thank goodness (keeping fingers crossed)!

White Cat

White cat, who lives at the barn, soaking up the sunshine.

White cat patiently endures relentless petting from Ella Grace.

This Seems Familiar...

Two things noticed yesterday that confirm a blossoming pregnancy:

* Closing the refrigerator door and hitting my belly (must stand progressively farther back from now on)!

* Hunger appears instantaneously. I have started stashing snacks everywhere (even in the car) because I when I want food, I want it NOW.

Garden Update #3

I have had these pictures for a week now, so I apologize for my tardiness in updating you on our garden's progress! Of course now everything is bigger and producing more/bigger fruit. We are beginning to feel that it is, in fact, garden season and starting to enjoy the fruits of our labor! Saturday night we had a wonderful meal of grilled pork chops, squash casserole made from garden squash, corn on the cob (not ours) and sliced cucumber and tomato from the garden. Oh, man, was it good!

I know that eventually we will come to dispise the sight of cucumbers and squash but for now we are thoroughly enjoying it!

Ella with her new Little Mermaid phone and our staked tomatoes.

L to R: Row of peppers, giant squash, okra, row of cukes, row of carrots with two little celery plants at the bottom, row of onions .

Onion giving the 'all done' signal (top laid over) and a chili pepper plant

One of the squash plants with lots of babies

A bell pepper coming on and one of the carrots we pulled to thin them out

The haul from yesterday (tomato not pictured). Those are japalenos!

Water Play

Yesterday was a pretty hot one in big KS. Ella put on her bathing suit and we went out for some good clean fun in the sun with the water hose. She had such a good time! Ella would run up to David, ask to be sprayed and then book it away as fast as she could. The camera doesn't do it justice, but I made a fine attempt at capturing the essence! Just imagine a really high pitched squeal with each shot of water.

What a pose! and Oh boy that's cold!

Ella sprayed David so this was retaliation and then a little hiney shaking!

Ashley's Birthday!

A most Happy Birthday goes out to dear Miss Ashley from Kudzu Jungle!

She is a fan of cats and perhaps some drinks to drink so I thought that this picture is appropriate for birthday celebration wishes! (She's also one of the biggest Potterholics I know, with some great theories btw, but I refuse to look for a picture of Harry throwing some back.)

Have a great 28th!

4th Celebration

I hope that everyone had a good 4th yesterday and is recovering nicely from any festivities. We went over to Angie and Scott's again this year for supper and their big fireworks blowout. It is just unreal to me what can happen when fireworks are legal!

Ella did really well, although in hindsight we should have gotten her some ear plugs! Angie bought some glow necklaces for the girls and seeing them reminded me of going to Stone Mountain and just begging to get one. (I wore Ella's for a little bit, just for fun!)

Little Miss with her Pops and some snazzy sunglasses

Both Little Misses

The arsenal

Yep, that would be a watermelon full of fire crackers

Not for long!

Four boxes of these 'ammo style' fire crackers going off at once almost made my ears bleed!

Kitchen View

This is the view from my kitchen sink. It's a good thing that I my sill is wide since I seem to pile up all kinds of stuff on it! Most of the garden pickin's end up there for a little bit of ripening or drying out. My Mother's Day pansies from Ella are in the yogurt cup and that's good ol' coon keeping a watchful eye out.

Like the privacy hedge made by the corn?!

I looked at this cup for days before I realized it was SOY YOGURT. Ick!

Faithful watcher outer.

Garden Color

Ah, summer is here! What a gorgeous variety of color coming from the garden.

Monday Funny

Half way!

Yesterday I officially reached 20 weeks along. Yippee! In trying to keep up with the Joneses (Andria, ha!) I will do a Half Way Through My Pregnancy Post. Andria and Pen both did them and in that spirit, here I go!

At 20 weeks, the State of the Blessed Union:

Belly pooch: Yes ma'am. Last week was the first time a stranger asked me if I was 'with child'


Hormonal rollercoaster: The wildest ride in town

Effort to stay off the rollercoaster: large. huge. enormous. massive.


Cravings: None really. The closest thing to one would be bacon. Yum! With Ella it was sausage. (Which somebody so politely pointed out was how I got into the situation to begin with!)

Pounds gained: -1. Seriously. Don't worry, the baby is large for her age so she's not suffering any by my lack of poundage. Also, as soon as I publicly announce no weight gain I will pack it on quickly.

Movement: Lots, and they are getting stronger by the day!

Gender: Sweet little baby girl

Stretch marks: None, thank goodness. I didn't have any with E so I'm crossing my fingers and hoping hoping that I won't get any now. I have put aside my usual cheapness and went for Curel lotion (the best! as introduced to me by Nikkers) to combat the immense amount of stretching that my skin is about to undertake.

Ability to bend over without groaning: fading quickly

Depth of belly button cave: shortening at an alarming rate

Shooting sciatic pain: I have adopted a new hobble/walk/limp

Pro to having a C-section: baby girl's head measured at the 97th percentile for her age

Name: Currently in negotiations

Daddy David's take on my pregnancy: He now has 10 different wives who all share one short fuse. (Is that supposed to be funny? I DO NOT have split personalities. Jerk. But maybe he's right, I mean I am a little weepy at times...*sob*. Poor guy! But it's OK because I have a wonderful little baby kicking around and making my belly grow and showcasing that I am a woman, doing what comes most natural :). Making me FAT, that's what this pregnancy is doing. I saw the cutest pants the other day that I won't be able to fit into for how long?)

E Fix

E has been a little absent from the blog lately so here is a quick fix. She wanted pig tails sooo bad this morning and I just had to oblige!

Pegged

Poor Miss Maggie got her foot smashed yesterday and had to be professionally stitched and bandaged. They did such a fine job wrapping her up that we thought she looked a bit like a peg leg! With a little help from Google images, I made up this picture of Cap'n Mags.

Look it up, dear

David and I always do our best to use the 'right' word for things with Ella. As a result, we are often asked the definition of certain words that we use. This past weekend we found ourselves acting as an open dictionary with Miss E and having to define the following words:

membrane
co-operate
trail
appropriate
acceptable
negligent

Whew! Surely she's destined to score perfect on the verbal SAT if we keep this business up!

Let's Talk About Sex

Updated!

Sometimes a girl just knows. She feels it deep down in her bones that she is 100% accurate and only hard evidence could change her mind.

Weeeell, that's what happened. The hard evidence proves that I was, in fact, wrong and we are having a baby girl!! Yippee!

Here are two of the best pictures from the visit. I know that even though these are the best ones of the lot, some people may not be able to 'see' but I will try my best to describe them!

Profile with a little hand up by the face

Baby girl has her hand on the back of her head (can't see the head), taken from the back. What you see is the left part of her back, left arm bent and hand.

Cast Your Vote

Alright, kids! Tomorrow is the big ultrasound day!

Cast your vote for the sex of the baby in the comments section. (I am officially guessing that it's a boy!)

What say you?!

Chap Stick Fiends

I have found my peeps.

Lip Balm Anonymous

This guy is killing me! I think I need to sign up, though... There would be no going cold turkey for me!

Garden Update #2

The weeds have been taking over the garden plot as of late and I have been letting them. Like turn a blind eye and hope that they go away, ignoring. It has been a bad combination of lots of rain and sheer laziness on our part and now we are dearly paying the price!

I have postponed any previous updates because of the shame that I would feel if you knew what the garden had come to! But, I have mustered up my courage and am prepared to share the highlights and lowlights of our current garden scene. (This is after several hours of weeding, hoping that I could get it cleaned up before the picture session but I only made a slight dent!)

Row of carrot tops and the beginning of celery.

Cucumbers and squash.

One of the tomato plants (with fruit!) hiding amongst the weeds and a pepper plant.

Baby squash and an onion blossoming!

A row that is partially weeded. Yikes!

E working in the yet to be weeded part.

It's a family affair!

Pick Your Battles

It just wasn't worth the fight this morning!

Who thinks she's adorable no matter what shoes?