Tatt Envy

I indulged in a guilty pleasure the other night and watched LA Ink. One of the artists did this tattoo that I just loved.

I'm not into tattoos for myself but I would love to have this design on a shirt or something!


Kick ass!

Bookworms: Endangered Species?

A recent poll by the Associated Press revealed that 1 in 4 Americans read no books last year. None.

Read the whole msn.com article here.

Can this be right? If it is, what the hell are we all coming to?!

I think this year I will hit the 10+ mark. (What with all of the Harry Potter rereading and such.) David will probably surpass me by at least 5 books to hit the 15+ mark! I just can't believe that one quarter of Americans haven't read a single book in a year! I think I agree with the article that the internet and TV are partially to blame for distracting those with a little free time. But then again, it's the people themselves who aren't cruising Amazon.com, or for goodness sakes the damn library!, looking for a book of interest. COME ON!

Please have mercy on me and tell me that you have read a book. Any book. Trashy bodice ripping romance novel? Great! (The trashier the better, in my opinion!) Dark mystery full of twists and turns? Perfect. Or perhaps a how to? Kids fictional boy wizard? Self improvement? The Bible?

Throw me a bone!

E says...

Happy 3 Day Weekend, Y'all!

Steel Magnolias

Who in the hell, in their infinite wisdom, let me watch the end of Steel Magnolias last night?! You should know that I know better than to do that! I have seen the movie umpteen times and I know what's gonna happen. But I just couldn't resist flipping to it when I saw that there was 45 minutes left. Aaaagghh!

I even thought to myself "Boy, I hope it's past the spaghetti scene, because that always makes me cry" and guess what? It was about 3 minutes before the spaghetti scene and I watched the whole damn thing anyway. I cried* and cried and then cried some more for the next 42 minutes! My only break was the commercials but even they weren't long enough to ebb the flow. Why couldn't I just push the button on the remote and go look for happier programs?! I just sat there thinking 'What if that were me and I was faced with losing one of my girls?' and commenced crying even harder. Somebody. Make. It. Stop.

*When I say cried, I don't mean quiet weeping. I mean almost full out sobs. Steel Magnolias plus raging torrents of pregnancy hormones shouldn't be combined!

One great line from the last few minutes: Clairee to Ouiser "I love you more than my luggage."

Birthday Wishes

Today is my mom's birthday! Yea!

Happy Birthday to you, Mom!

Circular

Ella Grace: "Ha ha ha! That cracks my head open!"

Me: "Baby, it's 'that cracks me up'."

Ella Grace: "That cracks my head up!"

Me: "Sweetie, 'that cracks me up'."

Ella Grace: "Mama! I mean 'that cracks my head open'!"

Me: "I give up."

Man in the Moon

Last night the moon was so surreal looking as it came up. (It wasn't near as dark as the photo looks.) I guess it's related to the eclipse that happened early early yesterday morning?

No Diapers?

I found this article on msn.com and am completely perplexed by it. Babies that go diaper free from day one? What in the hell?!

Diaper Free Baby

What do y'all think?

I can tell you one thing: baby Ashley will have her cute little hiney covered with a poop and pee confining diaper, thankyouverymuch!

Quick Fix of E

E in her new outfit from Grandmama and Miss Lil

Folktson Wedding

OH MY.

Laura sent this to me and I had such a huge fit! It came as a Power Point file which I converted to a movie file. It lost something in the conversion so I apologize for the grainy-ness but it is so worth it!

Folkston Wedding

At first I refused to believe that this was in Georgia, but I'm a rational girl and I can see how this could easily happen.

Big Bad Bruce

We love Bill Peet books at our house. David's parents read them to him when he was little and it has carried over with Ella. David's favorite was Jennifer and Josephine and he drove Jamie and his parents NUTS asking over and over for them to read it to him. (Bill Peet books aren't short, by any means, even if they are great!)

Ella inherited several books from Grandma and Grandpa, including the copy of Jennifer and Josephine. Unlike her daddy, Ella's favorite is Big Bad Bruce. She has large chunks of the aforementioned long book memorized and will correct you if you slip up on a word.

I finally got around to ordering our own copy of BBB instead of checking it out from the library and it arrived today! David is going to give it to her himself since they have a special connection with Peet books.

If you aren't familiar with these books I highly recommend them. The main character of most of them is an animal, which goes over well with Miss E AND they all have a moral. Very cool.

Perhaps you know of a little one who could use a new book? Check 'em out!

Sunset

David called me outside to see the sunset the other night. We just stood there and admired how cool it was.

On The Menu

Served up for supper:

Fried Okra, from the garden

Sliced tomatoes, from the garden

Field peas, from Peggy's garden

Cornbread muffins:

plain

cheese & bacon

cheese & japaleno, from the garden

Ham slice

Baby Beluga

Last night brought more swimming in the tub, which inspired Ella to sing one of the songs that she learned at preschool. As a general rule, I think that whatever Ella does is cute so of course I thought it was video worthy!

Baby Beluga Video

"Baby beluga in the deep blue sea,

Swim so wild and you swim so free.

Heaven above and the sea below,

And a little white whale on the go." (or 'whale of gold' as Ella says)

Ever worn these?

Manhattan may not have an Old Navy, Bed Bath & Beyond or Chick-Fil-A. We may be missing out on the super sales at Kohl's. We may only have one movie theater. But by golly we will soon have a Beer Goggles (although, being a college town, we have long since had beer goggles).

My boxing gym is situated right in between the new BG and a Mexican restaurant with the BEST cheese dip. That sounds like a good recipe for David: "hey, can you get some beer and cheese dip on your way out of class?"!

Where horses drink, we swim

After lots of inquiries from Ella Grace and fair bit of guilt on my part, I agreed to take Ella swimming this weekend. It's shameful how we haven't been to the pool even once this summer! Of course, just like the rest of the country, we are in a major damn heat wave this weekend. Ugh. Oh, and did I mention that going to the pool also requires me in a bathing suit?! Things just keep getting better and better.

I wanted very badly to keep my word to Ella and take her to the pool. So much so that I looked for a maternity suit at Target. 'Puh-lease' I scoffed at the dismal selection and outrageous price. But that paled in comparison to the scoffage that took place when I put on my regular suit from last year. (In all fairness, the suit was too big for me then and actually covered pretty well now.)

Wow. You have only heard stories and rumors of women who look like they are smuggling watermelons until you have seen me in this suit. It was and is a feat of structural engineering the way that lycra/spandex-y material stretched across my midsection. I feared for the eyesight of everyone within a 50 foot radius, should the material give way and take off like a rubber band.

But I wore the damn thing anyway, because I'm cheap and one hell of a mother. I toyed with the idea of actually going into public looking like I had raided a fruit stand but gave that up quickly in favor of the alternative that David came up with. He just so happened to have an empty water tank and would I like to bring that up to the house and splish splash around with Ella in the comfort of my own yard while he grilled up some delish kabobs? Yes I would, thankyouverymuch!

So there we went running water from the outside spigot into the tank. Even though it was 98 degrees at 6:30 last night, that water was COLD. Goosebump inducing, makes your arms steam when they come out, COLD. And I got in. Did I mention that I am the best mama of all time?!

Ok, so maybe I'm not the best mom ever since after the first picture I said "Sweetie, pour the water on your head! Hee hee!" and thus the second picture. Sounds like something my mom would have done to me...! :)

Yallwantsomesweettea?

Um, hell yeah. That's what I'm talking about!

I Wish I Lived in a Land of Lipton

(Thanks to Jamie for sending this over. She knows what it's all about!)

Garden Update, #?

Here are the latest pickings from the garden. Do you notice how I am not showing you what the actual garden looks like?! That'd be because it is a sorry, shameful mess. I don't know if we can dig ourselves out of the weed infestation this time!

Sadly, the squash and cucumbers have given up the ghost. Their lack of endurance is bieng countered by the tomatoes and peppers, however. Salsa, anyone?!

Here and There

No time or brainpower to sit down and compose a well thought out post. Random thoughts or bits of stories that I have been meaning to share is all you're going to get outta me on a Monday!

E's been her usual chatty self lately, coming out with a few gems:

David: "Sweetie, lean back. I'm trying to wash your hair out."
Ella: "I'm busy playing."
David: "I'm busy trying to give you a bath!"
Ella: "Well, that's not my problem!"
That's what I call some sassin'!

I try, as hard as I can, to give Ella some sort of an accent. The bland
Kansanese here is winning the battle, but I will take my victories (no matter
how small) whenever I can get them. The other night all the stars were aligned
just right because she said 'y'all', 'fixin' to' and (drumroll, please) 'THA Wal-
Mart'. I gave her an extra little treat, just because her mama love love loves to
hear that kind of talk!

Is it neccesarily bad if I take my prenatal vitamin with a gulp of beer?

I need my roots touched up, pronto.

I wore a watch with a dead battery all day Friday. I knowingly put it on that way.

I sneezed a sum total of 732 times Sunday. WTF?!

New panties make me happy. And hell no, they're not maternity. Please girls, don't ever do that to yourselves or your husbands! Those things are vile!

How much would it cost for Merry Maids to clean my filty, squalor-ish house? Must investigate.

If I leave David's resume under his pillow, will the job fairy come?

Last week while cruising down a four lane, a guy pulls even with me and starts pointing, trying to talk to me. I'm utterly confused until I see his Georgia G sticker on the back of his vehicle. He had seen my sticker and license plate and wanted to say Go Dawgs! (Yep, we rolled down our windows and chatted while driving down the road. He was from Monroe!)

Preach

As told to me, with a slight alteration:

"You shall know the truth, and the truth shall set you free."

A man in Topeka, Kansas decided to write a book about churches around the country. He started by flying to San Francisco, and started working east
from there. Going to a very large church, he began taking photographs and
making notes.

He spotted a golden telephone on the vestibule wall and was intrigued with
a sign which read "$10,000 a minute."

Seeking out the pastor he asked about the phone and the sign. The pastor
answered that this golden phone is, in fact, a direct line to Heaven and if
he pays the price he can talk directly to God. The man thanked the pastor
and continued on his way.

As he continued to visit churches in Seattle, Denver, Michigan, Chicago,
Minnesota, and around the United States, he found more phones, with the
same sign, and the same answer from each pastor.

Finally, he arrived in Georgia. Upon entering a church in Athens, behold, he saw the usual golden telephone.

But THIS time, the sign read "Calls: 25 cents."

Fascinated, he asked to talk to the pastor.

"Reverend, I have been in cities all across the country and in each church I
have found this golden telephone and have been told it is a direct line to
Heaven and that I could talk to God, but, in the other churches the cost was $10,000 a minute. Your sign reads 25 cents a call. Why?"

The pastor, smiling benignly, replied, "Son, you're in Georgia now; it's a
local call."